365 DAYS OF GRATITUDE – DAY 88: Road Maps of Desires

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Today is my birthday and I am celebrating…. well, I am celebrating me! I am grateful for all the experiences I’ve had in my life so far, for all the knowledge that I have accumulated and for all the levels of transformation I have gone through until today. I am grateful that I am sharing all this with you. Thank you for being here with me.

There is no greater freedom than being who you are and living your life from a place of power and inner strength. There is so much joy in defining what you truly want and then start taking the steps to make it happen.

I take time to define my new desires and aspirations every year, sometimes even on my birthday, as part of my inner celebration. Why don’t you join me?

Take five sheets of paper and title them:

  • My relationships
  • My career
  • My finances
  • My internal/spiritual life
  • My health
  • My romantic life

I call these the 5 Road Maps Of Desires. On each page write your ultimate desires; do not hold back, start writing, get more paper if you need extra pages, juts keep writing what you would like to have and experience in your life. Keep writing. You can keep changing your mind over and over and add as many details as you can picture in your mind.

I want you to keep adding things to your 5 road maps all this week. Keep your 5 road maps papers handy so that you can keep writing things down.

Write at least 25 things in each one of them. This will start to flex your imagination muscles, so to speak. When I did this exercise for the first time many years back, I realized that it was not that easy to voice what I wanted. I had no idea that I could want many things and I thought that it felt like splurging.

Do you get that? Splurging? It was just writing what I wanted on a piece of paper. I was not in the habit of being clear about what I wanted and I censored my desires even in my thoughts, as if I was not entitled to them.

If this is hard for you right now, just think about this: how are you going to create your desired life, if you cannot even envision it? Let the imagination flow, flex your dreaming muscles and start writing what you want. Start working on your road maps of desires.

Love,

Rucsandra Continue reading

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365 DAYS OF GRATITUDE – DAY 87: Clearing Broken Promises

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There is an extraordinary gift of lightness and clarity that comes from clearing the energy of broken promises. I want you to have this powerful experience and witness the emotional strength and peace that come with it.

Are there any promises that you have made to others or to yourself that you have not kept?

Have you made your list? Good! Wonderful!

This list is not for you to start thinking about how many promises you have not kept and start judging yourself. The purpose of this list is to create the opportunity to go and clear your broken promises, one at a time.

Mark Twain said it so well in “What Is Man?”:

“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.”

Going through your list and assessing, completing and finding ways to keep your promises to yourself and others will create a magnificent sense of inner well being.

You will feel instantly clearer with every promise you honor, because you will have YOUR OWN APPROVAL!

So go through your list and do what you need to do. If there are promises you made that you know you cannot keep, go and talk to the persons you made the promises to, including yourself and explain why you cannot keep your promise.

Find a way to clear the waters of your own conscience and do not let yourself and others wait in vain.

Go and say “I am sorry I promised such a thing to you when I knew I could not keep my promise.” or “I thought I could do it, but the truth is…. Please forgive me. Maybe I could do this for you instead?”

If there are things that you can do to honor some promises, but just did not get around to it, then make it a priority to do them one by one.

Emotional clutter stems partially from the energy of your broken promises. Go and restore the INTEGRITY of each and every one of your promises, one by one, until all your list is clear.

You will be surprised by the sheer power of honoring your word.

I will leave you today with a quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson:

“It is easy to live for others, everybody does. I call on you to live for yourself.”

Live for yourself, with integrity, clarity and joy. I want you to have your own approval. This is my wish for you.

Love,

Rucsandra

 

 

 

365 DAYS OF GRATITUDE – DAY 86: Promises You Did Not Keep

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There is a great tool that I have used to help me clear emotional clutter, doubts and fears. What I am sharing with you today is powerful and quite easy to do; all it requires is your desire to examine your life with no judgment, understanding and compassion.

I want to go back to the concept of authenticity I wrote about yesterday. Authenticity implies integrity. In order to honor yourself and be authentic you must learn to keep your promises to yourself and others.

You must be able to trust yourself.

Are there still areas of your life where you are not yet authentic? Make a list so that in the upcoming weeks and months you can do what you need to do in order to create full authenticity in your life. Take it one step at a time and clear everything that keeps you apart from your authentic self.

Are there any promises that you have made to others or to yourself that you have not kept? Make a list of all these things. Do not judge yourself for what you find. Make your list and set it aside. Being aware of your patterns and getting out of the habit of ignoring things that nudge at you will strengthen you emotionally and will clear away layers and layers of emotional clutter.

I will talk more about integrity and its sheer POWER in tomorrow’s post.

Love,

Rucsandra

 

 

 

365 DAYS OF GRATITUDE – DAY 85: Authenticity

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“Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.” Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection

Show up and be real! I strive to do that everyday, and if I start to feel uncomfortable in my own skin, it means that I am not showing up fully as myself. This awareness is a gift, because it allows me to realign, re-calibrate and return to who I truly am; it allows me to stay real.

Authenticity means undisputed credibility; it means to be true to one’s personality, spirit, or character; genuine, real; not false or copied.

Being authentic implies that you honor yourself. Being authentic means you stand by yourself in all your choices, words, actions and mistakes. Living authentically is not always easy, as it requires you to pay attention to your words and your actions; to continuously stay in touch with your feelings and ask yourself the questions that you would rather not ask.

The inner fight between your heart and the reality you are creating for yourself, between what you truly desire and what you are allowing as part of your life can tear you apart in more ways than one.

“Authenticity is the alignment of head, mouth, heart, and feet – thinking, saying, feeling, and doing the same thing – consistently. ”  – Dr. Lance Secretan

Here’s my invitation to you:

  • Write down two aspects in your life in which you are ALREADY authentic: a little one that you might think is not that important and a bigger one that you are proud of.
  • Then write down two aspects in your life in which you believe yo are not YET authentic: one small, that you can change right away and one bigger, that you do not know what to do about.

How’s that sound? A little scary? Great! Do it anyway. Your authenticity is worth it.

Love,

Rucsandra

 

 

365 DAYS OF GRATITUDE – DAY 84: Forgiving Yourself

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“Remember, we do not have to know how to forgive. All we have to do is be willing to forgive. The Universe will take care of the how. ” – Louise Hay

Forgiveness is a choice. We might not know how to forgive but first we must be willing. I shared with you the painful and powerful moment in my own life when I came face to face with forgiveness as being my choice. In the post entitled Ioana’s Death I wrote:

“In that courtroom, I was fully present in a heightened state of awareness. I was aware of the greatness of that very moment. I knew that it was my choice and my choice only. Life is truly made of what we choose to do with what we encounter.”

Forgiving yourself is no different. You have the power to choose forgiveness over punishment, shame, guilt and blame. You are powerful beyond measure and you have the capacity to set yourself free. But you must want it first and, as Dr. Wayne Dyer says “be willing to entertain the possibility”.

If you are facing the choice of forgiving yourself or continuing to punish yourself for days, months and years to come start here, right now.

Ask yourself if you are willing to forgive the person you were when you did what you did or made the decision that you have been regretting and blaming yourself for ever since. If you are not, accept it as it is, knowing that the possibility exists and revisit the question in a few weeks.

If you are willing, then make the choice right now: choose forgiveness. So far you have been choosing punishment, over and over. Choose differently this time. Choose to forgive yourself.

Trust life to show you how. Your willingness to choose a new path for your life is enough to set the wheels of the Universe in motion. Stay open, allow yourself to be vulnerable, listen and pay attention to the changes that will take place inside you, one step at a time.

Give yourself permission to forgive. You can do it. I know you can, even though you might feel that you cannot. I will hold the torch for you: the torch of refusing to continue limiting yourself by not letting go. YOU CAN DO IT!

Love,

Rucsandra Continue reading

365 DAYS OF GRATITUDE – DAY 83: Can’t Forgive Yourself? Shatter some taboos!

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It is easier to forgive someone else than to forgive yourself. Why do you think that is? I will tell you what I came to understand about this inability to forgive ourselves. Our upbringing and what our families, schools and society taught us from a very early age among other things is that we are supposed to have all the answers, to be better than others in order to succeed, to be on top of all things at all timer, to work really hard, to keep our mouths shut and to sacrifice ourselves for other people.

With what I know and understand now, I consider that about %90 percent of what we were taught about relationships, money, wars, sex, intuition, power, love, success, history, failure and life in general does not serve us at all. Shocking? Maybe, but think about it with an open mind. Were you taught with kindness, compassion, forgiveness and unconditional love or were you taught through discipline, through punishment and reward, through judgement and comparison with other kids? Take some time to think. This might be rough for you to look at, but please do. Give yourself the gift of honesty and clarity. Let me know if I can assist you with this. What I now know is that understanding the past through the lens of compassion and with an open heart allows us to grow emotionally, to become aware, to be authentic and access the joyful, non-suffering quality of life.

You might not agree with what I am saying, and that is OK. Do not agree, but allow yourself to look at things from different perspectives, to question everything and then decide for yourself. What I am doing is offer you another option, a different angle and sometimes maybe a breath of fresh air through a new view on things.

I don’t like taboos and believe that we must break free from them. Wikipedia says:

A taboo is a vehement prohibition of an action based on the belief that such behavior is either too sacred or too accursed for ordinary individuals to undertake, under threat of supernatural punishment. Such prohibitions are present in virtually all societies. The word has been somewhat expanded in the social sciences to strong prohibitions relating to any area of human activity or custom that is sacred or forbidden based on moral judgment and religious beliefs.  “Breaking a taboo” is usually considered objectionable by society in general, not merely a subset of a culture.

Let’s break some taboos right now by being willing to look at things that are hard to look at and that are not talked about.

Going back to how you were brought up, you now have a very strong belief in success and failure, right and wrong and you believe that the wrong doings must be punished; you believe that so strongly, that you are willing to punish yourself for years for something you did in your past. You think that you failed or you believe that you were wrong and you look at your past decisions with judgment and with no compassion. You want to punish yourself because you think you did something wrong and you are willing to continue punishing yourself for years and years.

I say that is ENOUGH! Haven’t you suffered enough? Haven’t you felt the pain of it all over and over? Let go, let go, let go. Break the taboos within yourself. You did the best you could at the time, with what you knew to be true at that time. How many more years are you going to make yourself suffer? Be willing to contemplate forgiveness. There’s more to come tomorrow, but for now, just contemplate the possibility of forgiveness.

Louise Hay says:

“Remember, we do not have to know how to forgive. All we have to do is be willing to forgive. The Universe will take care of the how. “

Love,

Rucsandra Continue reading

365 DAYS OF GRATITUDE – DAY 82: The Truth is Setting You Free

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Today is a great day! I am excited to share with you this extraordinary tool that I used a few times when other methods did not seem to work.

Today, you will feel the power of a Truth Letter, written with full honesty and without judgment.

This is what you do: set aside some time for yourself in a quiet space in your home, in the woods, at the beach, wherever you are. The physical location is not important as long as you have privacy and you set aside about 6o minutes of undisturbed time. It is important to have enough time, so that you do not feel rushed, so that you can be fully present with yourself, your letter and your unique process in the moment.

I want you to stay open and release the resistance of your mind. This process will take place in your heart, in your emotional system, so ask your mind to watch but not interfere. You can do this. Have your Truth Letter handy.

Sit down, close your eyes and do the Square Breathing technique for a few good minutes. Take your time, this is important. Your body will relax; you will feel calmer, quieter, ready to release emotional clutter, ready to let go of what does not serve you. Anger, pain, shame, frustration and hatred eat away at your well-being and weaken your immune system. Breathe and get ready to release this emotional debris that has been holding you captive for a long time.

In this deeply relaxed state, imagine the person your Truth Letter was written to. I want you to close your eyes and call them to join you in their energy form. It does not matter if they are still on this earth or if they have passed away; if you call them from your heart, they will come without hesitation. Breathe and wait a few seconds and then remember them in great detail, as if they are physically right there with you: their face, their hair and their clothes; their posture and facial expression.

One important thing here: when you call this person to join you, he or she will arrive in their essence; there will be no anger, blame, finger pointing or judgment on their part either. They will be the observer and they will listen fully and with compassion. The connection you are creating in this moment is sacred and takes place at soul level, it is above blame and guilt and shame.

Thank them for how quickly they responded to your call and then, keeping eye contact with them in your mind, read them the letter from beginning to end. Read your letter out loud, as if they are right there with you. Keep breathing throughout and remain calm. After all, you are speaking the truth about how you feel. If your emotions become too strong and you start to feel overwhelmed, stop, close your eyes, return to the square breathing until your heart slows down and then continue reading. Read everything you wrote but do not judge them if you are remembering certain events and circumstances. They joined you at your request so that they can truly hear you and be a witness to how you feel, not to be told what they did wrong. Remember, this is not about them; this is about YOU and you alone. As you are reading your Truth Letter, do not get involved with the story, do not get sucked into the past drama of your pain and upset. Just read how you felt then and what you feel now.

Read them the entire letter and at the end hold their gaze. They heard you, they heard every word you said and they understood your pain. You will see it in their eyes; you will hear their words; they will say “I am sorry”; they will truly mean it. Thank them for coming and for listening to you fully and for being a willing witness to your deeply buried pain; then say good bye, thank them again and let them leave your awareness.

Remain in this sacred space of healing and allow the deep release to take place.

By speaking your truth, you are cleansing at a cellular level, releasing deep seated emotional residues.

Breathe.

The truth is setting you free.

Love,

Rucsandra Continue reading